So I recently had a horrible experience at my yoga studios. I teach every Saturday at 9:30 am in Montgomery since 2011. Some of the people who come have been coming that long. Others come and go. Right now, about 60 folks are meandering in and out of that class. The room holds about twenty comfortably with tons of room to do yoga Ohio style. Twenty-five fit nicely, but the mats need to squeeze together a bit and be stacked in a zig zag zig zag. If you live in a larger city you know what I’m saying.

At Elemental OM we offer over 60 classes a week between three studios. Most of our classes have five to twelve people. It is a total aberration to have more than twenty yogis in any class and I can only think of five on our 60-class schedule that regularly do. My Saturday class is one of them. Well, the last 2 weeks I have had about 26 – 27. That’s tight.

At Elemental OM we have a policy of locking the doors 5 – 10 minutes after a class starts. It really is up to the teacher and the pattern of the class. I tend to not lock the doors until much later so folks are trained in a bad way they can come in late

So back to Saturday. It is week two of my 27 human class and folks are coming in to sign in. When it gets to about the 11th person signing in they start to realize it will be a big crowded class again. They start to complain. Now I’ve gotten up that morning and mentally prepared for the class to be uplifting  with a great message and 17 folks walk in complaining. My mood shifts to a bad one.

So I sit down to teach the class and the energy in the class is off. Folks are everywhere because no one really wanted to scoot over. It looks like an explosion of yoga mats on the floor. Not to mention all the crap. My training was hard-core. No water. No props. No shit on your mat. Anyhoo….

So I gotta lock the door not only because it is 5 after, but we sincerely can’t fit another yogi. And then the knocking begins. And it isn’t knocking. It is pounding on our glass door so hard the entire door and its frame are rattling. The yogis look at me pleadingly and are asking to let the person in. Others are looking at me like “don’t you dare.”   You see, it is really disruptive when you are late.  I sit there trying to please everyone and I try to make a joke about being late, etc. etc.

I don’t let the person in. I feel bad about this, but the room was clearly split and there was no way to win. That’s when one of the students who has practiced with me for years says, “Well, you could show a little compassion.” Ouch. That’s harsh. I’ve been doing this since 07 and winning on empathy and compassion. My feelings are hurt but really I’m just pissed. So I taught I good technical class with absolutely zero inspirational messages. It was basically just put your hand here or your foot there. It was a hard class because I was pissed and I like to use my yoga mat to transform being pissed. When pissed I can hold a down dog for 30 minutes.

The next day I get an email from a student very sick and in the hospital. I cancel her membership even though it is against our very clear terms and policies. I send a card and a really nice note. I put her on my personal notebook to send prayers and meditate to her benefit for the week. This is standard operating procedure at EOM. You never hear about it because if you are going to do something nice just do it and don’t market it.

The next email I open is from the person I’ve known for years who demanded “compassion” on the late arriver who pounded like a gorilla on the door after everyone complained about the numbers in the class. He was quitting his “association” with the studio. Who would want to be associated with such a shitty and hate filled studio after all?

It just makes me realize I am failing as a yoga teacher. It is impossible to teach in 1.15 hours once a week the actual foundation of yoga, which includes empathy and compassion, but also the much harder lessons of life like showing up on time and not stealing time from others. Not to mention sharing and helping and serving others. Not to mention being curious about situations as life lessons. Not to mention Tat Tvam Asi that everyone is you.

Lessons for me:

  1. I’m stepping away and will not be teaching any regularly scheduled yoga classes for a while.
  2. Leadership sucks and the constant pressure to please everyone in an age where each person thinks they can do and say anything is exhausting. I could write a novel about our current state of selfishness. Just saying.
  3. Enforce your policies consistently and equally at all times.

Lessons for you:

  1. Be on time. It is rude and disruptive to come to class late. The entire mood of the room is shifted and believe me because I have a front row view of the students, they are annoyed at you. They are not being kind and compassionate because you are late and must have had a bad morning.
  2. Use your memories.   Don’t let your memories use you. When you are at any place of business rely upon your total experience with that business. No business (except for Target) is going to get it right all the time.
  3. Moral superiority is actually blindness to your own nature. Realize you are being that way and take a cold dark deep dive back into your nature.
  4. Know that you don’t know.   Be curious about the total picture instead of becoming the central character in the picture. You have no idea what is playing out until it comes to conclusion.
  5. Make space for grace. Everything happens for a reason. Each day brings new lessons to inform you of your own being. All ends well. (stop complaining)

So I will see all of you in the fall. Please enjoy the other 50+ teachers on our staff and be kind to them. They are humans who do what they do out of love. Trust me they aren’t getting paid enough for the 30 minutes they get there early, the 1.15 hours they spend on the mat and the 30 minutes they stay after holding space for you and your problems. They don’t get paid for the prayers they offer on their own time. They don’t get paid for the time they take to share music and poems. They don’t get paid for the notes sent to the team that you are suffering and need a little extra help. They don’t get paid for the research they do to connect you with healers and alternative therapies.   All this they do for love you.

*The sole purpose of these articles is to provide information about the tradition of ayurveda, yoga, and meditation. This information is not intended for use in the diagnosis, treatment, cure or prevention of any disease. If you have any serious acute or chronic health concern, please consult a trained health professional who can fully assess your needs and address them effectively. Check with your doctor before taking herbs or using essential oils when pregnant or nursing.